The Living Yoga Newsletter 14

The next 80-10-10 Class is forming now!  This 8 week health
course has been a really big hit, and I'm offering it
again, on Monday evenings (7-9pm) from June 9th - July 28th.
Please let me know right away if you are interested!
You can see a description of the course under the
Services tab at www.LivingYogaNow.com .  And if you scroll
throu this newsletter you can read what previous students have
said about the course.

Yoga Classes:  Wednesday  mornings, 9:30 - 11
in my home studio.  See www.LivingYogaNow.com  for details.
Join at any time, your first class is free!  $15 drop-ins,
or save with a 10-class pass.
New Early-Bird Yoga Class!  Ellen will be teaching a
Vinyasa I class at A2 Yoga in Ann Arbor, Thursday mornings
from 6:30 - 7:30 am.  Start your day off right!
www.a2yoga.com  for more info. and to register.

"Ellen is a wonderful instructor - passionate about the
material.  I felt free to ask questions.  She knows her
material backwards and forwards, and has a lot of energy!
She is living what she instructs - you can see it in her
actions and lifestyle."   -Cindy Gomez

"Amazing combination of depth of information presented in
such good humor.  I have had several days of totally raw
eating now, and I love the way I feel and the change in simpler
grocery shopping!  Overall, I consider this course well
worth the money."   -Jim Stafford

"This course has given me a lot of confidence through the
information provided to make many changes in my diet."
-Kathleen Douglass

"The food served was beautiful!  And I enjoyed the
preparation demos with the various tools."  -Karenda Seiler

"The food was great, very tasty, especially the pasta
(which tasted exactly like wheat pasta!)."  -Katya
Rachevich

"I loved all of the food - a wonderful treat.  Couldn't
improve on that!"  -Kendra Theriot

"The food demos were wonderful.  It was nice to actually
see how to make them."  -Jeanne Rowlette

"After taking Ellen's 80/10/10 Class, you will have much
greater control over your life, because you will 1) fully
understand the path to optimal health, 2) learn what the
tools are that make this path easy, 3) learn how to lose
unwanted weight, if you have any, and most importantly you
will see that you can eliminate unwanted symptoms by
addressing the root causes of why you have symptoms of
dis-ease.  I think what Ellen and the other Natural
Hygienists are teaching is essentially "internal
environment optimization."  Words can not express the joy I
feel in being one of the lucky few to have found Ellen
Livingston.  At times I can't believe she lives right here
in Ann Arbor; we are so lucky!"   -Heather Shirley

Dining Out - In the Raw

"But how can I eat at restaurants and social events?"  This
is one of the questions asked most frequently by people
adopting a raw vegan diet.  I think it speaks to people's
experience of  today's society as one which lives to eat!
Nearly every family gathering, date, social gathering,
business meeting, festival, celebration or party of any
kind centers around food.  Unfortunately, most of the food
being served at these events does not serve our health.

You can succeed healthfully in this environment if you have
a few tools in your belt.  First, knowledge is power.
Knowing why you are committing to healthy eating is the
first important step.  If you are confident of your healthy
path, you will have the strength to persist through
challenges, and you will be able to approach challenges
with creativity and a can-do attitude.

Most of the time when people fail to stick to their raw
vegan dietary program at a restaurant or social event, it's
because they feel insecure.  A food solution is nearly
always available, but you must be willing to stand up for
yourself and your healthy goals.  This can be as simple as
clearly communicating what you would prefer to eat - there
is no need to explain the details of your diet.  In fact,
it is more appropriate to discuss the reasons or health
benefits behind your choices at a time when you are not
focused on sharing a meal with others who eat differently.

Arrive at social events prepared, and expect the best!
When you act from a place of knowledge and confidence, you
will readily see solutions to any "problems", and other
people will respect you even if they don't understand your
choices.  When you act from a place of doubt and fear, you
invite negativity and failure.  This is the most important
tip I can give you for succeeding in social situations and
eating away from home!

Now that you know how important it is to create a strong
foundation for health success, I'll share with you some
specific tips for dining out in the raw:

Day 26 - Time to eat!
I am glad I will be allowed to have food today, because
after feeling physically rather lousy yesterday, I was
surprised to have a significant bowel elimination, even
after 25 days with no food going in!  I worried that a
healing crisis like that would warrant continuing my fast
another day, but Doug says it's time to eat, and Lennie
says, "be thankful for a great liver flush!", so I am glad
that my body was able to eliminate, and glad that I
continued the fast long enough for my body to get to this
level of cleansing.  I have lost a total of 19 pounds.

After a day of waiting, 3:00 finally rolls around and it is
"Watermelon Time!".  Everyone showed up for lecture today,
knowing it would be followed by our celebratory meal.  And
so we gather around a big table in the dining room -the
first time we've been allowed to set foot in here since we
arrived! -  and our meal is served.  Each of us has a
knife, fork, napkin, and a plate with a paper thin
half-moon of watermelon.  The table has been set lovingly
by the interns. Camera flashes go off all around us as the
interns do a photo-shoot of this momentous occasion.  Doug
makes rounds, congratulating and hugging each of us
individually. There are a few tears. We have truly
accomplished something worth noting.

Day 27
More watermelon for breakfast - in fact watermelon will be
our only food for three days.  I don't mind at all, it
still tastes so incredible, and I'm certainly hungry enough
to eat almost anything!  We're given bigger slices now, and
allowed seconds, and by dinnertime are entrusted to eat all
that we want, mindfully.  By 11 am I have my first
post-food bowel movement, and all is well.  I shed some
tears of relief, knowing that everything will be better
from now on, I have taken a big step for health.

We are encouraged to begin gently moving our bodies, just
walking around the grounds and stretching.  It feels good,
but I feel very weak.  Doug reminds us that essentially we
are still fasting, because our caloric intake is nowhere
near enough to meet our needs yet.  So we are instructed to
take it easy and continue resting.

My strength restored, I eat my biggest watermelon meal at
lunchtime, and hope I haven't overdone it!  My whole
digestive system feels much steadier today, and more
comfortable.  It's clear, however, that I pushed the limits
with this meal, so I rest in bed until lecture time.

Day 29
I awaken from a frightening dream in which I find myself
torn between worlds - wanting to be present for my yoga
students, but finding myself transported in consciousness
to some other place, led there by a god-icon that has
appeared by my side.  I am caught in a powerful struggle in
and out of two worlds, wanting to fulfill my commitment to
my yoga students, but unable to stay in their world long
enough.  I am very attracted to the other-worldly place,
but a demonic monster appears and keeps pulling me back.  I
try to escape its clutches  . . .  I wake up.

Before breakfast  I have my first "normal" bowel movement
since before the fast.  I am eating quite well now,
approaching normal quantities already, and almost ready to
streamline down to just three bigger meals a day.

For lunch today we are finally offered a new fruit -
papaya!  Here in Costa Rica it is called a "tree melon",
and it comes closer in density to a watermelon than does a
mango, so papaya is introduced to our sensitive systems
first.  It tastes okay to me, a little weird, and
definitely sits heavier in my gut than the watermelon.

Day 31 (nothing reported on Day 30)
Another bad headache, after a night with lots of bowel
elimination, and I am very tired and weepy for the second
day in a row.  Lennie comes to see me on my balcony after
breakfast, and we have a long talk.  Lennie suggests that I
commit to doing the tedious work of reviewing my memories
that are associated with certain key emotional states I've
identified that seem to hold me back, and one by one
release the memories.  I'm concerned because I think I have
so few memories of this kind, and can only list about 8 on
paper.  After Lennie leaves, I decide to gather a pile a
stones and let each stone represent one memory.

I lie down on my bed with my pile of stones beside me.
Each time I pick up a stone and hold it against my body, I
relive a memory, identify where in my body I hold the
feeling associated with that memory (the identified feelings of
worthlessness, unloveableness, or rejection), and then take
the stone (and the feeling) away from my body and set it
down next to me.  I have a breakthrough experience as the
memories I believed were lost now flood into my
consciousness, 71 of them!  After going through the steps
with each of these 71 memories, I throw each stone (and
memory) off my balcony, one by one, consciously choosing to
let go of these burdensome memories I've been schlepping
around for so long.

I was skeptical of this release technique, but the insights
I receive are powerful.  I have discovered that I have LOTS
of memories in this feeling category, and I have held
nearly all of these feelings of unworthiness and rejection
in the region of the solar plexus (some in the heart
center), the exact region where I have experienced so much
physical suffering with an inflamed esophagus.  I feel such
a big, positive shift, and I can't wait to share my
breakthrough with Lennie.  All of the self-pity I've been
weeping with for the past two days vanishes.

Day 32
Cantaloupe for breakfast!  It tastes so rich and
deliciously satisfying after so many watermelon meals.
I feel better this morning than I have yet, and I am
encouraged to try a fitness class with Doug.  It is super
hard but also a lot of fun, with lots of laughs at our
atrophied bodies.  Only five of the twelve fasters show up
- I am amazed that more don't take advantage of this rare
opportunity for a special class with one of the world's
finest fitness experts!

I have worked up a big appetite for the banana smoothie
lunch, which is tastefully thicker today.  It goes down
fine, but still sits heavy in me all afternoon.  Dinner is
wonderful :  papaya-O.J. drinks, a papaya platter, and a
big green salad with tomatoes (in season here and
incredible!), cucumbers, and a mango-berry dressing, made
with some tart little Costa Rican berries.

I am enjoying reading "Eat, Pray, Love", by Elizabeth
Gilbert.  I love these passages:
"I just want God.  I want God inside me.  I want God to
play in my bloodstream the way sunlight amuses itself on
water." (p.185)
"Happiness is the consequence of personal effort.  You
fight for it, strive for it, insist upon it, and sometimes
even travel around the world looking for it.  You have to
participate relentlessly in the manifestations of your own
blessings.  And once you have achieved a state of
happiness, you must never become lax about maintaining it,
you must make a mighty effort to keep swimming upward into
that happiness forever, to stay afloat on top of it.  If
you don't,  you will leak away your innate contentment.
It's easy enough to pray when you're in distress but
continuing to pray even when your crisis has passed is like
a sealing process, helping your soul hold tight to its good
attainments.  .  .  . The search for contentment is,
therefore, not merely a self-preserving and
self-benefitting act, but also a generous gift to the
world.  Clearing out all your misery gets you out of the
way.  You cease being an obstacle, not only to yourself but
to anyone else.  Only then are you free to serve and enjoy
other people." (pp.272-3)

Day 33
My sleep has become restless and fitful, with lots of bowel
activity, disturbing dreams, and sometimes hours of
insomnia.  I have repeating dreams about being sucked
downward, grabbed and pulled away from where I am trying to
go, of being relentlessly pestered and even tortured. At
least I seem to have the strength in the dreams to fend off
these attackers and continue on my way.  I got very firm
with one dream-woman who was pulling me back, and told her
in a very loud voice to "Get lost!".

I think I am contending with fears about going home to my
regular life, with all of its stressors.  The relative
bliss of the fasting experience, where my sole agenda was
rest, is over now and it is almost time to go home.  It's
time to take responsibility for creating health in my
everyday world.  I do not feel ready, not at all.  I am not
confident of my ability to secure sufficient rest and peace
of mind in my busy, pressured life at home.  I still have
healing to do, and I hope I can create a healing
environment at home, but I am definitely concerned.

Digestively speaking, I am still succeeding, but still
feeling challenged by each banana lunch, especially now
that my sleep is disrupted.  I will ask Lennie to prepare
me a mango smoothie for lunch tomorrow, and take a break
from bananas.  Dinners are getting interesting now, and
include simple soups, salads, and dressings.  I am getting
some great food ideas.

I am inspired by this quote from Gurumayi:
"The whole purpose of life is to undo your impression of
limitation and the fear of the world that comes with it.
The whole purpose of life is to strengthen your mind, your
heart, and your body so that you can experience the Truth
once again.  God's glory.  Boundless joy.  Unconditional
love.  True devotion, and also the great virtues that
inhabit you as an integral part of your nature . . . . If
you hold yourself back because of fear, you will lose
everything."  ("My Lord loves a Pure Heart", p.10)

Day 34
Last night I had a digestive flare-up, my old esophagus
pain returned.  I felt devastated, and afraid.  I wanted
comfort and reassurance from Doug that everything would be
okay, that the fast had worked, but it was late and I
thought he might be sleeping. Instead I lay outside under a
glorious field of stars and let my pain be soothed by
feeling my connection to the Universe.  The pain subsided
in a couple of hours (not the usual 2-3 days, thankfully!),
and I was able to sleep.  I was strengthened by my ability
to handle this episode by myself (with a little help from
the Universe!).

This morning I took a walk with Doug and told him of my
experience.  He heard my concern, and my fear, but assured
me that this was not a big deal, and not unexpected.  While
I cried, he encouraged me to keep stepping up to the plate
one day at a time, to stay in the present moment, and to
keep doing the right things to create health, to just keep
taking responsibility for my health, and keep trusting the
process.  I hear this, and I am strengthened by his words
and his patient support.

Back in my cabin, I write down realistic strategies for
creating a healthy environment where I can continue my
healing at home while living my life, caring for my
children, and managing a business.

Lennie gives us a wonderful food prep demo, and I am able
to enjoy a large and delicious dinner meal, including
cabbage.  Yea!

Day 36
I am enjoying Doug's rehab fitness classes, getting ideas
for home workouts, and going on longer walks up and down
the mountainous roads surrounding the retreat center.
Sometimes my arm and leg muscles are sore beyond any
experience I've ever had, and I have to take a rest day or
two.  I am surprised and humbled by this process of
restoring my muscular strength after a month of bedrest.
It is clear that the younger fasters are recovering their
strength faster than us older folks.

Day 37
This is my last day, and night, in this little room.  I'm
glad to be moving on, but still wishing for more recovery
time in this place of warm sunshine and understanding
support.  What a trek this has been, and continues to be!
I am impressed and delighted by what I have been able to
eat so far, but also know that I need to implement some
serious changes at home.  I look forward to my comfortable
bed at home, and my simpler dinners.  And I can't wait to
wrap my children in my arms.

My esophagus is still sensitive, but much less so.  I will
have to be happy with this result.  My digestive system has
been re-set, and is much improved already.  My skin is
baby-soft and smoother than ever. Emotional and spiritual
gains have been enormous, and will continue to unfold with
time, I am certain.  My weight and strength will return in
due time.  I feel like a new person, but still in fledgling
form, strong yet delicate, and in need of some protection
for a while.

Day 38
Group photos, and the long bus ride back over the mountains
to San Jose.  Last night's dinner was an especially fun and
festive affair, and really brought a nice sense of closure.
The bus ride today provides a perfect transition space.

Back at our first night's hotel, we enjoy a final dinner
together.  I have the good fortune to share a table with
Doug's parents, Marty and Bea, and get to hear interesting
stories about Doug's childhood!  Doug's wife and child,
Rozi and Fayechesca, arrive late, tired from their journey
from England, so they don't join us.

Day 39 - Going home
This morning I have a wonderful long one-on-one connection
with Roz.  We share fasting stories, parenting stories, and
life stories.  It makes up (a little) for my disappointment
that she wasn't present during the fast.  I feel happy,
knowing that I have Doug, and Roz, and Lennie, and all the
interns and fasters in my life, and in my support-circle,
as I prepare to return to Michigan this afternoon.

 

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